Baseball’s Hall of Fame could easily fix steroids-era dilemma – San Francisco Chronicle

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Players don’t care about juicing. For decades their union fought every drug-test proposal. Fans don’t give a moldy churro about juicing. They flocked to watch Barry Bonds go deep after he blew up like a Macy’s parade balloon, cheated on his wife and on his girlfriend, and disrespected teammates and managers.

What are we, Quakers or baseball fans?

The U.S. Constitution has been amended, why not a Hall of Fame voting rule?

The Hall is owned and operated by a private family foundation. If the family would drop those three words, we could all stop fighting and start enjoying a museum that honors guys for their baseball fame, not for their character, whatever the hell that is.

But if the family won’t budge, that’s better for me. Next door to the HOF, I plan to open an integrity-free Hall of Fame, honoring famous but imperfect players. There will be a juice bar.

Welcome to Blooperstown.

Scott Ostler is a San Francisco Chronicle columnist. Email: sostler@sfchronicle.com Twitter: @scottostler

Deep thoughts, cheap shots & bon mots …

The Patriots apparently see Chip Kelly as a very smart and innovative NFL coach. But what do they know?

Prediction: When all the hiring is done, the 49ers will not reveal which person has final say on such matters as draft picks. Is it the coach, the general manager, Jed York, Paraag Marathe? No, it’s all of the above, working in wonderful synchronicity. This is the Jed York School of Cool Corporate Culture. He will announce that all big decisions are made jointly. It’s all about illusion and confusion.

If the 49ers wind up with two Shanahans, one thing that should be decided up front: When things go wrong, who fires whom? “Uh, Mike? Kyle would like to see you in his office. And bring your playbook.”

Be interesting to see if Kyle Shanahan is a strict-discipline guy like his dad was as a first-time head coach. When Mike was fired by Al Davis in 1989, one of the reasons given was that Shanahan wouldn’t allow players to sit on their helmets on the sidelines at practice, an old Raiders’ tradition. Seriously.


Bill Belichick reminded us that he’s no social-media nerd. “As you know,” he said, “I’m not on SnapFace and all that.” But Belichick does put up regular posts on SourPuss.

Interesting revisionist history by Mike Nolan in a recent KNBR interview. Nolan debunked the popular legend that he drafted Alex Smith over Aaron Rodgersbecause he considered Smith the more malleable of the two. Whatever, Mike. Rodgers gives thanks every day for that decision.

I’m not saying Bud Selig doesn’t deserve to be enshrined. Just not in the Baseball Hall of Fame, even though he shattered all the commissioner-salary records. Selig should be chiseled into rock on Mount Budmore, along with Bud Abbott, Larry “Bud” Melman, Buddy Holly, Bud Light and Zola Budd.

The Raiders reportedly are considering playing some preseason games in Las Vegas. Maybe they will play one, because the novelty would guarantee a sellout. But two would be tempting embarrassment and disaster. There aren’t enough suckers in Vegas to keep buying practice-game tickets, and a sparse crowd might scare off potential financiers for the Raiders’ new palace.

Look, I don’t want to return to the good olde days. I enjoy the crazy celebrations in the NFL, and even some of the taunting. But when did we reach the point where every play concludes with a heated jaw-off? Every play! Every cornerback is Deion Sanders and every guy who catches a pass is Terrell Owens.

Knucklehead of the Week

LeBron James

King James is one of the greatest athletes of all time, but not one of the truthiest. After his run-in with Draymond Green, James said, “It happened so fast I didn’t even know who it was.”

Replays clearly show James taking a loooong look to his left at the approaching freight train.

“I’m OK,” James shrugged after the game. “I’m a football player.”

“Really?” said every football player. “When we get hit, we try not to fall like an 80-year-old learning to ice skate.”

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